A Simple word. Challenging concept. It can be a blessing or a curse.
As a curse, that vulnerability can lead to exploitation. The vulnerability is often emotional, a need to be needed, wanted, loved.
Therein one can be blinded to the behaviors of another as they use the meeting of our needs to meet their own and in time, at our expense. This vulnerability can keep one in a relationship longer than what is in our interest.
This kind of vulnerability is often an extension of a childhood where there may have been abuse in the home or a lack of parental availability due to violence, substance abuse or serious mental health, even poverty.
However, there is another kind of vulnerability. This comes from an openness, transparency and authenticity about oneself. This kind of vulnerability is used more with intention. It allows others in and to make connections.
This kind of vulnerability may create a safe space for others to be vulnerable too, to be seen, felt and heard. This kind of vulnerability also has the capacity to set boundaries though, to know when and where is enough. In this sense, vulnerability is a strength.
It can be helpful for people to explore their vulnerability, their capacity to know where their emotional hardships lie and how to manage and use them.
There is an honesty in knowing one’s issues and then opening oneself up, particularly in the service of another, where not for exploitation, but connections and growth we share of ourselves.
When vulnerability is a curse though, it is not safe to open up for our issues can be used against us. If feeling blamed, shamed or feeling compelled to do things that make us feel uncomfortable, those are the telltale signs of exploitation. Resist such vulnerability and learn to take care of oneself.
As a blessing, we can use our vulnerability to open doors to the emotional expression and healing of others. We are not taken advantage of, yet we may serve. Therein is growth.
If you are unsure of where you stand with your vulnerability, speak with a counselor and explore the place of its origin, use and impact.
Learn to make it your superpower.
